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Us Old Farts

Whitebear

Silent Prop
R. I. P.
A wealthy old lady decides to go on a safari in Africa, taking her
faithful aged poodle named Cuddles along for company.

One day the poodle starts chasing butterflies and before long, Cuddles
discovers that he's lost. Wandering about, he notices a leopard
heading rapidly in his direction with the intention of having lunch.

The old poodle thinks, "Oh, oh! I'm in deep doo-doo now!"

Noticing some bones on the ground close by, he immediately settles down to chew
on the bones with his back to the approaching cat. Just as the
leopard is about to leap the old poodle exclaims loudly, "Boy, that was one
delicious leopard! I wonder if there are any more around here?"'

Hearing this, the young leopard halts his attack in mid-strike, a
look of terror comes over him and he slinks away into the trees.
"Whew!",says the leopard, "That was close! That old poodle nearly had me!"

Meanwhile, a monkey who had been watching the whole scene from a
nearby tree, figures he can put this knowledge to good use and trade it
for protection from the leopard. So off he goes, but the old poodle
sees him heading after the leopard with great speed, and figures that
something must be up. The monkey soon catches up with the leopard,
spills the beans and strikes a deal for himself with the leopard.

The young leopard is furious at being made a fool of and says,
"Here,monkey, hop on my back and see what's going to happen to that
conniving canine!"

Now, the old poodle sees the leopard coming with the monkey on
his back and thinks, "What am I going to do now?", but instead of
running, the dog sits down with his back to his attackers, pretending he
hasn't seen them yet, and just when they get close enough to hear, the old poodle says:

"Where's that damn monkey? I sent him off an hour ago to bring
me another leopard!"

Moral of this story...

Don't mess with old farts...

age and treachery will always overcome youth and skill!

Bullshit and brilliance only come with age and experience!

Enjoy

Scotty
 
Good one WB
While we're telling stories with morals, ever hear the one about the monkeys and the banana?

The story goes that a group of researchers placed five Chimpanzies (sp?) in a cage that had a step ladder in the middle of it that would give any chimp who climbed it access to a banana hanging from a string. The only problem was anytime a chimp would approach the ladder as if to climb it the resaerchers would spray all the chimps in the cage with cold water. It wasn't long before any chimp approaching the ladder would be beaten savagly by the other chimps.

The researchers then removed one of the control group chipms and inserted a new chimp into the group. While this chimp was exploring his new home he spotted the banana and made a beeline for the ladder. Before his hairly little hand could make contact with the ladder he was tackeled by two of the control group chimps and beaten down by the whole group. That chimp never made another attempt at the banana.
The researchers repeated this until all of the original control group chimps were gone and the five chimps that remained knew nothing of being sprayed with water. As a matter of fact they had not even seen the hose.

Any time a new chimp was added to the group and that chimp made for the ladder he or she would be attacked and beaten down. The chimps had no real idea why they were reacting that way all they knew is, that's how shit was done around there.

The moral of the story is don't just follow the group, assume nothing, question everything.
 
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